Maintaining relationships even with those relatives who break the relations & abuse:

Maintaining relationships even with those relatives who break the relationship & abuse it:

Maintaining good relations with those who are good with us is easy and indicates a general human tendency. The real mujahida (inner struggle) and test of character lies in our response to those relatives who abuse and ill-treat us. For, an untamed Nafs will always be craving for revenge. Only an Allah-fearing soul can attempt to treat with kindness even those who are not it's well-wishers. Such a fortunate person is called as 'Al-Waasil' by the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam).

Narrated Abdullah bin Amr (RA): The Prophet (PBUH) said, “Al-Waasil is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives, but Al-Waasil is the one who keeps good relations with those relatives who had severed the bond of kinship with him.” (Bukhari)

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that a man said: O Messenger of Allah, I have relatives with whom I try to keep in touch, but they cut me off. I treat them well, but they abuse me. I am patient and kind towards them, but they insult me. He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If you are as you say, then it is as if you are putting hot ashes in their mouths. Allah will continue to support you as long as you continue to do that.” (Muslim)

Someone asked the Holy Prophet (Peace be up on him), “What is the way of saving oneself in the Hereafter?” He replied: “You maintain the ties (of relationship) with the one who severed it with you, you give to the one who deprived you, and you forgive the one who wronged you.” (Tirmidhi)

 

The lessons we draw from these Hadiths are:

1. Islam came to set all our relationships right. This includes our relations with Allah as well as with other human beings. Silat-ur-Rahim (maintaining bonds of Blood-relationships) is a very important part of the latter. And it applies even to those relatives who are not good to one. So, there is no excuse for cutting-off family relationships.
2. Allah's support is guaranteed to the 'Waasil'.
3. It is the way of saving oneself in the Hereafter.

The other big benefit of this is that the one who practices this patiently and consistently hoping only for Allah's grace will attain control over his Nafs and achieve Tazkiya.
 

Dhikrullah protects against Satanic whispers:

Dhikrullah protects against Satan:

"He (God) enjoined upon you to remember God (do Dhikrullah). As the one who remembers his Lord is like a man who is chased by his enemy, but he reaches to a fortress where he saves himself from the enemy. Similarly a servant of God cannot save himself from the Satan but with the remembrance of God (Dhikrullah)". -Tirmidhi (Hasan-Sahih), Ahmed 

"If anyone withdraws himself from remembrance of (Allah) Most Gracious, We appoint for him a shaytan (devil), to be an intimate companion to him." (Quran- 43:36)

There is a famous Hadith mentioned by almost all the books of Hadiths in which Saeed Ibn Musayyib related from Samra Ibn Jundub (R.A) that one day the Messenger of God (S.A.W) related a long dream in which he saw a follower (ummati) being surrounded by Satans. Then the remembrance of God (he used to do) came and drove the Satans away.

-'al Wabil as sayyib' by Ibn AlQayyim R.A.

"Allah has built two houses in the heart of man, in one of which

an angel resides and in the other the Satan. The angel urges him to do good works and the Satan induces him to do evil works. When man remembers Allah, the Satan withdraws. And when he stops remembering Allah, the Satan perches on the heart of man and peeks with his beak to whisper into it to do evil things." [Transmitted by Abu Ya‘la on the authority of Anas رضي الله ﺗﻌﺎﻟﯽٰ عنه , as quoted by Tafsir    Mazhari- tafsir Mariful Quran].

Sayyiduna Anas ibn Malik (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Rasulullah 
(sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:
“Indeed Shaytan places his snout on the heart of Ibn Adam, when he 
remembers Allah he withdraws and when he becomes unmindful of Allah, 
then Shaytan devours/whispers into his heart, this is what is meant by 
‘Al Waswas’ and ‘Al Khannas’ [mentioned in Surah Nas].”
(Musnad Abu Ya’la, Hadith: 4301)

Although the above Hadith has been recorded with a weak chain, Hafiz Ibn 
Hajar (rahimahullah) has cited supporting weak narrations, which when combined, gain collective strength. The Hadith in question is suitable to quote.
(Refer: Fathul Bari, under Hadith: 4977)

Imam Bukhari (rahimahullah) has also recorded a similar narration as the 
statements of Sayyiduna ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas (radiyallahu ‘anhuma) under the sub-heading and not part of the Sahih as this narration does not meet his strict criterion.
(Sahih Bukhari, before Hadith: 4977)

(Research on the last Hadith by: Moulana Suhail Motala on HadithAnswers.com)

Fourth step To Taqwa:Adopting the company of Pious & Reading/listening to their exhortations

On The Road To Taqwa: Step Four

STEP FOUR

Listening to the quotations of the pious

O servant of Allah! The best thing to do after all of these steps is to frequent the company of pious and to adopt their manners. This will lead you to taqwa. 

(O you who believe! Fear Allah and be with those who are truthful.- Quran, 9:119)

We have chosen a few of their beneficial quotations.

Abu Bakr Siddiq says: 'Whoever enters his grave without any provisions is like the one who mounts the sea without a ship.'

Uthman says: 'Concern for the world is a darkness for the heart and concern for the Hereafter is light for it.'

Ali says: 'Whoever seeks knowledge, Paradise seeks him and whoever seeks sin, Hell seeks him.'

Shaqeeq Balkhi (rh) says: 'Hold firm to five issues: worship Allah as much as you need to worship Him; take from the world according to your stay in it; sin according to your stamina to absorb its punishment; take provisions from the world according to your stay in the grave and work for Paradise as much as your desire to stay there.'

Hasan Basri (rh) says: 'The heart becomes corrupt through six means: committing a sin in the hope of repenting; seeking knowledge and not applying it; practice without sincerity; eating the sustenance of Allah without appreciating Him; not being pleased with Allah's allocation (destiny) and burying the dead but not learning from them.

lbn Qayyim (rh) says: 'The sign of taqwa is to engage in worship and the sign of worship is to refrain from doubtful issues. The sign of hope is to obey and the sign of forbearance to shorten false hopes.

These are four steps towards taqwa. You should look into yourself and see how far away you are from these four steps. Only Allah can reconcile our intentions with action.'

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 Extract from 'The Provision of the Believers'. Originally published in Arabic as: Zadul Mumineen Al-Taqwa, published by Maktabul Sahaba, Egypt.

Compilation of statements on "taqwa" (fear of God), taken from classical Muslim scholars such as al-Ghazali, Ibn al-Qayyim, and Ibn Rajab.

Translated by Maulana Mohammed Amin Kholwadia, compiled by Abu Maryam Majdi Fathi Al-Sayed.

Source http://balagha.net/taqwa-provision-of-believers/road-to-taqwa-step-four

Third step To Taqwa:Exerting oneself in acts of obedience

On The Road To Taqwa: Step Three

Exerting the self towards acts of obedience

This trait is acquired when the servant knows the value of what he wants from the bounties of the Hereafter. 

A predecessor said : 'When a man knows the value of what he seeks spending for it becomes easy.' This is why the pious acted upon the Quran and Sunnah. If they performed a good deed they would be grateful for it and ask Allah to accept it. If they committed a mistake they would be greatly grieved and ask Allah to pardon them.

It is reported that a group of people came to visit Umar ibn Abdul Aziz (rh) while he was sick. A skinny young man was with them. Umar asked him how he had come to that state. He replied that he was sick. Umar asked him to tell the truth. He said: 'O leader of the believers! I have tasted the world and found it bitter; its glitter has no attraction for me; its gold and stones are the same to me. I live as if I see the Throne of my Lord and people are being escorted to Paradise and Hell. So I remain thirsty (fast) during the day and stay awake during the night. Whatever I am going through is little and meagre against the reward and punishment of Allah.'

Abu Nu'aim (rh) says that Dawood Tai (rh) used to drink bread soup instead of eating bread. Someone asked him why he did that. He said: 'There is enough time to recite fifty verses when I drink bread soup instead of chewing bread.'

So think, O servant of Allah! How one should use one's time and how we waste it - except those upon whom Allah has shown mercy.'

The wife of Masrooq (rh) says that Masrooq always had his calves swollen because of lengthy prayers. I used to sit behind him and weep out of affection for him.'

Abdullah ibn Dawood (rh) says that they used to roll up their beds (sleep very little) as soon as they reached forty.

Abu Darda says: 'If it were not for three things I would not like to live a single day: remaining thirsty for Allah in the afternoons: prostrating in front of Him at night and the company of those who sift the best of conversation like people sift (choose) the best of fruits.'

Ali ibn Abi Talib says: 'The signs of the pious are that they are pale out of vigilance: they have weak eyesight from weeping ; their lips are withered because of fasting and they are covered with the dust of the devout.'

Hasan was asked: 'What is it about those who strive that they are very handsome?' He replied: 'That is because they are alone with The Compassionate.'

So, O servant of Allah! Make sure that you strive so that Allah will be pleased with you and grant you Paradise. Otherwise, you will lose out in both worlds. May Allah protect us from clear loss and desertion. Ameen.

He also says: 'From among the bounties of this world , Islam is enough for you. From the occupations of this world , obedience should occupy you and from the lessons you should learn, death is enough to teach you.'

Abdullah ibn Masood says: 'There are so many who are lured to destruction through bounties ; there are so many who are tested by praise and there are so many who are deceived (vain) by concealment (of their mistakes).'

Yahya ibn Mu'adh (rh) says: 'Congratulations to those who leave the world before it deserts them ; to those who build their graves before they enter them and to those who please their Lord before they meet Him.'

Ali says: 'Whoever desires Paradise will race towards good deeds; whoever fears Hell will abstain from temptations; whoever is certain of death will cease to find pleasure and whoever recognises the world will bear difficulties with ease.'

Hamid al-Lifaf (rh) says: 'We sought richness in wealth and found it in being content and we sought comfort in the world and found it in the Hereafter.'

Abdullah Anaki says: 'There are five remedies for the heart:

1. the company of the pious;
2. recitation of the Quran;
3. emptying the inner self (of vices);
4. praying during the night
5. and crying at dawn.'

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 Extract from 'The Provision of the Believers'. Originally published in Arabic as: Zadul Mumineen Al-Taqwa, published by Maktabul Sahaba, Egypt.

Compilation of statements on "taqwa" (fear of God), taken from classical Muslim scholars such as al-Ghazali, Ibn al-Qayyim, and Ibn Rajab.

Translated by Maulana Mohammed Amin Kholwadia, compiled by Abu Maryam Majdi Fathi Al-Sayed.

Source http://balagha.net/taqwa-provision-of-believers/road-to-taqwa-step-three